Journalism Goes to the Dogs, Media Publishes Anti-Trump Op-Ed Written by Dog
President Donald Trump faced near-immediate backlash Tuesday for referring to former White House staffer Omarosa Manigault Newman as “that dog” in a tweet.
Many called his most recent tweet using the word both sexist and racist.
“But to call a woman of color a ‘dog,’ especially a former staff member of Trump’s own White House, is so blatantly sexist and racist, that the entire question of whether Trump is either of those things needs to be concluded once and for all,” CNN reported.
The New York Times also reported that this tweet was simply Trump adding another name to his “the growing list of African-Americans he has publicly denigrated on Twitter.”
Now, an actual dog has written a letter to the president urging him to stop calling people dogs.
As Chicago Tribune reporter Rex Huppke explained, his dog “dictated” the note of protest as he “typed, as the size of keyboard keys are discriminatory against large-pawed animals.”
After an appropriately dog-like digression about “rolling on a dead bird in the backyard or eating things that will make me throw up,” and more, the dog proceeded to explain her distaste for Trump’s use of the word “dog” as an insult.
“I am writing because I have noticed that you keep comparing human beings to dogs. I know this because I hear the television news humans talking about it on almost every station. (I no longer watch Fox News because, after many years of promises, I have yet to see a single fox I can bark at. That is false advertising and I am sad about it.)”
After requesting Trump kindly deport all squirrels, the passionate dog went on to say she does not understand why the word “dog” would ever be insulting.
“On behalf of myself and my friends I must protest. You seem to be using the word “dog” as an insult. I do not think that makes sense,” the letter says.
“Dogs are loyal and beautiful and loving, except to squirrels and sometimes cats, although that whole relationship is rather misunderstood because we really just want to sniff their butts. It’s kind of our thing,” she added.
She also explained she was told by Ron that what Trump is doing is “something that ‘fascists’ do.”
“I think you are calling people dogs because you think that makes them less than human,” the canine remarked. “My human says that’s something that “fascists” do. I don’t know what that means, but it makes me think you are not being a good boy.”
After stating the “bad large human president” seemed unintelligent “because dogs are wonderful and intelligent and filled with love,” she added that his lack of “animal friends” was cause for suspicion.
“I understand you are the first president since William McKinley to not have a dog. That’s weird,” she said. “You don’t have any animal friends, and that makes me suspicious.”
The passionate dog ended her letter with a request that President Trump stop using the term “dog” and instead realize that “humans and dogs are both great and deserve respect and lots and lots of (peanut-butter flavored) Milk-Bones.”
“Thank you, and please consider my suggestion that you deport all the squirrels. I really think they’re up to something,” she concluded.
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